Exciting Investment Opportunity: 2 Stupid Cats Hot Sauce

2-stupid-cats-hot-sauceIt’s official*, my hot sauce company — 2 Stupid Cats Hot Sauce — has finally launched.

We’re currently producing three fabulous flavors:

  • Pineapple-Carrot Habanero
  • Coconut-Garlic Sriracha
  • Cilantro-Lime Jalapeno

All 2 Stupid Cat hot sauces are made from scratch with only the finest organic ingredients.

And of course, all of our sauces are made with bits of real cat, so you know they’re good.

2 stupid cats hot sauce

*Note: this is not official. There is no company. I just made some hot sauce.

Tipping the Scales: How to Spend More Time Creating Than Consuming

Watching Breaking Bad, listening to Van Morrison radio on Spotify, reading the latest Clive Cussler novel (he’s the king of Indiana Jones-esque historical fiction/adventure, in case you were wondering), perusing a MarketingProfs or Content Marketing Institute post, eating buffalo chicken nachos at the Irish pub down the street…these are all examples of content consumption.

Hold up. Buffalo chicken nachos? Content? But of course. Someone cooked the chicken and chopped the jalapenos and combined those ingredients to produce something with tremendous value. Spicy, delicious value. As consumers, we stare in awe at the glistening cheese, we smell the fiery buffalo sauce, we hear the tortilla chips crack and crunch, and we feel the greasy goodness on our fingertips.

Oh yeah, and we eat them. And they’re flippin’ tasty.

Alright, back on track. The point I’m trying to illustrate here is that it’s easy to get addicted to consuming content. And for good reason: There is a ton of content out there. You could easily fill out several lifetimes trying to consume all of the content that’s been created by your favorite authors, musicians, podcasters, chefs, etc. Don’t get me wrong: Consuming content is a good thing. It teaches us, it entertains us, it inspires us. But if we dedicate ALL of our free time to consuming, how are we supposed to get good at creating?

Practicing Creativity Will Make You a Better Content Creator

By cutting consumption and increasing production, we can all become more efficient and prolific content creators. How many of us spend between 75 percent and 100 percent of our free time consuming?  We’re watching YouTube clips, we’re listening to music, we’re ordering pizza, we’re buying a clock made out of driftwood on Etsy. Why aren’t we recording our own videos, or making our own music, or baking pizza from scratch, or learning new skills so we can complete fun projects?

Shamrock Relief Carving Sit Down and Whittle Some

Worried that my brain was slowly eroding into mush, I decided to make a conscious effort to tip the scales…to create more than I consume. In addition to devoting more time to the creative activities I know best (playing music, writing, cooking), I also decided it was important to learn something new: I wanted to add a new category or channel to my creative repertoire. So, one Saturday morning I walked down to the hardware store, bought some woodcarving knives, bought a few blocks of wood, and whittled me something fierce. (And by “whittle me something fierce” I mean I Googled how to do basic relief carving and then carved a shamrock.)

I learned a lot that weekend. For example, I learned that woodcarving is a very precise art that requires extreme concentration and a very, very steady hand. This ties into another lesson I learned: woodcarving knives are sharp. Really sharp.

The finished product isn’t perfect, but that doesn’t matter. I didn’t carve my shamrock to to sell it, or to have it judged by a panel of art critics. I carved it so I could enjoy the process of carving it.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, it’s time to make some buffalo chicken nachos.

Kitchen Creation: Pulled Pork Nachos

pulledWhat you’ll need:

  • Bone-in pork shoulder
  • Apple cider vinegar
  • Cola
  • BBQ Sauce
  • Tortilla chips
  • Shredded cheese
  • Toppings (jalapenos, green onions, etc.)
  • Slow cooker
  • Oven
  • Phone number of a well-respected cardiologist

Step 1

Trim off any excess skin/fat from the pork shoulder.

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Step 2

Put the pork shoulder in your slow cooker (setting: Low) and pour in some cola and apple cider vinegar (roughly two-thirds cola, one-third vinegar). The majority of the pork should be submerged, but don’t worry if some sticks out.

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Step 3

Put the lid on the slow cooker and go away. Read a book. Fly a kite. Sketch a Sasquatch. Bottom line: You’ve got to let that pork shoulder cook for a looooong time. Five hours is good. Seven hours is better. Ten hours or more will make for some seriously tender pork.

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Step 4

Pull the pork (i.e. take the shoulder out of the slow cooker, separate all the meat from the bone, drain the slow cooker, then put the meat back in).

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Step 5

BBQ sauce bath! Drench the pork in BBQ sauce and let it cook for between 30 minutes and an hour.

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Step 6

Spread some tortilla chips on a baking sheet, pile some pulled pork on top, throw on some cheese and toppings, bake in the oven, and voila! Pulled pork nachos.

pulled pork nachos YUM

Best Sandwich Ever? Thanksgiving Leftovers Sandwich. Next Question.

What you’ll need:

Scali bread. It has to be Scali bread. It’s Italian, it’s delicious, get some.

-Thanksgiving turkey

-Mashed potatoes

-Stuffing

-Corn

-Cranberry sauce

-Mayonnaise

Just slap some mayo on the bread, stack those Thanksgiving favorites as high as you can, and POW. Best. Sandwich. Ever.


Wake up the next morning after your Thanksgiving sammy binge and find more leftovers in the fridge? Whip up some mashed potato pancakes and scrambled eggs with turkey. #ForTheWin

Some Like It Hot Sauce

Let’s not beat around the jalapeno bush here: I am addicted to hot sauce. I – quite literally – put that sh*t on everything. Salads, soups, burgers, burritos: You name a food that isn’t ice cream and I’ve probably hosed it with hot sauce and shoved it in my face.

There’s some actual science behind this madness. When you burn your tastes buds with hot sauce, your body perceives it as pain and releases endorphins to counteract that pain. Those endorphins create a sense of euphoria and you essentially start getting high off hot sauce. Keeping that high requires just one thing: more hot sauce.

I’ve now reached the point where buying hot sauce off the shelf doesn’t do it for me. There’s too much food coloring. Too much mild. Not enough scalding insanity. So, this past weekend, I decided to pull a Breaking Bad. I bought a trailer, drove off into the desert, started cooking, and – in my opinion – ended up with a superior product.

How to Make Homemade Hot Sauce

Step 1: Roast a bunch of  hot peppers (I used habaneros), onions, garlic, and bell peppers in the oven for a while.

Step 2: Put all that roasted goodness in a food processor and add some lime juice, apple cider vinegar, shredded carrots, and whatever else you want.

Step 3: Vzzzzzzzzzzsssssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Step 4: Put it in a bottle and give it a funny name. (I went with Erik’s Homemade Bumhole-Burning Habanero Hot Sauce.)

Happy hot-saucing.